


A morbid curiosity

by HeichouMFBadass, Larryflippedthebird (HeichouMFBadass)



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: I'm Sorry, M/M, lol i did this for an english literature assignment
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-12
Updated: 2013-11-12
Packaged: 2018-01-01 06:55:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1041719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeichouMFBadass/pseuds/HeichouMFBadass, https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeichouMFBadass/pseuds/Larryflippedthebird
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry's dead. Louis knows that now</p>
            </blockquote>





	A morbid curiosity

**Author's Note:**

> this was an assignment submission for my eng. lit. class  
> Thats why its complete shit
> 
> my teacher gave me the WTF face, i think she realized that it was a slash story
> 
> And then that one tutoring lesson she told me and 5 freinds that she used to write slash fics too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A Morbid Curiosity

 

_Why did you stop talking?_

_Because he died._

Sitting under the stars in our tree, words from the many days of therapy mixed and swirled around my head with the old thoughts I had learnt to subdue.

Battling depression is not something any person should have to endure, unfortunately not all escape it.

I definitely didn’t.

 

_Where did you meet?_

_Outside my university._

_How?_

_It was quite sudden._

 

Harry had launched himself into my life and proceeded to creep into every crevice of my entire being.

I guess our friendship had been a curiosity. Quite a morbid curiosity in fact.

The first time we met he had quite literally launched himself into my life. Mainly to push me out, off the road and away from a red, double decker bus. After that rather shocking event he proceeded to carry me, bridal style, into a park so that i could regain my composure.

 

That park is one of my fondest memories. The day he captured my heart (Not that I knew it)

_Who was he?_

_Harry_

_Can you tell me about him?_

_I guess._

 

Harry was an oddity. Boys like Harry didn’t exist in Doncaster, Fit and amazingly kind. They especially didn’t exist with emerald eyes and dimples. The urge to reach out and run my fingers through his dark curls every minute I was with him physically overwhelmed me, soft and fresh smelling as they were. It was a fondness I had never known. Of course I had other friends but we became inseparable, after that day it was almost impossible to see one of us without the other.

 

_What did you and harry do when you were together?_

_Not a lot._

We had clicked, a camaraderie formed between us. Like we had known the other since childhood. It was so simple, just spending time together, laughing enjoying life. He slotted in so seamlessly that I can hardly remember my mundane life before him.

Most days we would go to the park or play FIFA or watch stupid romcom’s, or cry over the titanic.

Even drinking tea was eventful with him.

Had we never met I would not be here now.

 

_Do you think he was meant to be there for you?_

_Yes._

As I look back on it I believe that harry had been sent by fate, destined to be my guardian angel. He protected me, like he knew when I was going to hurt myself.  Mostly it was just the simple things. Reminding me to concentrate when cooking, opening a door if I forgot. At the time I didn’t notice, I had always been clumsy.

But then there were bigger things.

A text message that would get me out of harms way at exactly the right time.

A request to meet him somewhere. A shopping list or even just a reminder to be home early.

The time when I got off my bus because harry called and asked me to grab some Nandos on the way home. On the news that night was the bus, it had been hit by a freight truck at the next stop over from the one I got off at.

The time that he came to pick me up from my class early and took me to lunch, that was the time our university was attacked by a terrorist bomber.

These might seem like a coincidence to most but to me I knew he was there for a reason.

Unfortunately I had taken him for granted and assumed him to be unbreakable. 

 

_Do you know how he died?_

_I was there._

 

He told me that he had loved me from the start.

He told me that I was all he wanted.

He asked me to stay with him forever.

 

I didn’t know I loved him back

 

If I had not had an epiphany at the crossing, if I had not hesitated for that brief moment, if I had not doubted myself.

He would not have thought I was rejecting him.

He would not have started to cross.

I could have pulled him back.

He would not have been hit by that car, the one that ran the red light.

_Did you try to save him?_

_Yes._

_Why did you stop?_

_Because he was gone._

_When did you accept he was gone?_

_When I realised that I loved him._

 

The one thing **_I_** could have done to **_save him_**. But I didn’t.

I could have said yes.

 

_He’s gone._

_He is gone._

_He Is Gone._

 

The wait at the hospital was the worst three days of my life. To know that the most constant person in your life is losing theirs cannot be explained.

To know the pain you have to live it

…

The first day was pain and torment, sorrow and hope.

The second: you see their life drain away and you feel that yours does too.

The third you feel numb.

 

_You are alive, but only just._

 

Now I realise that he was everything to me, I know why life has been unbearable for the past month.

Now I know what I am missing, I know why I stopped talking and eating and living.

 

_“The Pain that comes today is here then goes away. To touch something real will help your wounds heal. Like the sun on your face, the dreams, the starry nights.” ( More than life, Whitey)_

My friends are what pulled me through.

My family.

My music.

 

His Love

 

 

 

 


End file.
